


JANE

by Lucca_Jeller



Category: Blindspot (TV)
Genre: Drama, F/M, Family Drama, Family Fluff, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-16
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:20:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26499274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lucca_Jeller/pseuds/Lucca_Jeller
Summary: Jane ... she is lot of things. An incredible one, capable of surpassing itself and reinventing itself in many ways.When the doors are closing everything seemed to have come to an end, life could only be preparing something much better for her and Kurt.
Relationships: Jane Doe | Remi Briggs/Kurt Weller
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	JANE

The table was full of everything she loved most: food and family. The house full of friends. Happiness seemed so palpable, perceptible to all your senses. The taste of the food, the noise of the children, the smell of the people, the calming colors of the room, the warmth of Kurt's hand holding hers.  
“We are so lucky.” he said smiling with those eyes that brought the sky for every second of her day. – “It’s a miracle that we are all here. Any mistake could have changed everything. There were so many unfavorable possibilities that we would never get here.”  
And suddenly, everything around her is transfiguring.  
She's back in Times Square. She hears Kurt shouting her name, but the darkness is closing in on her. No matter how hard she is trying, she has no longer she has the strength to fight.  
It's cold, so cold ...  
"No!" she screams at herself refusing to give up. Concentrates on sucking the air around you.  
One, two, three attempts.  
She feels the pressure on her chest.  
And everything materializes around her again. Her home, her family, Kurt. Everybody is happy. Nothing warmed her heart more.  
It's too fast for her to stop and too slow for her not to feel her soul falling apart. She looked at the place and the people, but there was no familiarity with them anymore.  
Desperate, she grabbed the hands of Kurt and Avery sitting beside her at the table. And one by one they all disappeared until only the three were left there. The house, the table, everything is gone.  
“We are so lucky to have you, Jane.” The daughter's voice echoed distantly.  
She let her determination consume her completely. I wouldn't give up on those who were left. They would always be hers, always! Avery and ... the sweet man with the beautiful blue eyes and the crooked smile.  
Darkness...  
Darkness...  
*****************  
“We managed to stabilize it after injecting the antidote. She is intubated, but stable. We performed a tomography and an MRI to assess brain damage. Unfortunately, it was very extensive. Discouraging, I would say. She probably wouldn't survive without respiratory support.”  
Kurt had to put his hands on his face looking for anything that would be able to bring him the concentration needed to support it.  
“In view of the diagnosis, you have the right to opt out of the devices.” The chief physician continued making him even more stunned. “The case does not conclude as brain death, but we also have no precedent for reactions to this new type of ZIP. Under normal circumstances, this medical board would advise: let you rest in peace, Mr. Weller.”  
But Kurt's mind was too empty to formulate an answer. In the past few months he was sure he was experiencing hell in life away from his daughter, accused of terrorism, running away and being hunted by Madeline. But it was much worse. There, she was with him. What was all the stability that lay ahead now?  
She reported the repetitive nightmares to him one by one. She volunteered to confess everything to get them off the black site. Shit! She hadn't been doing well since her merger with Remi. A single consultation with a psychologist was not enough to organize the whole mess.  
How did he trust to leave her alone with the antidote? Jane was under the influence of that drug and did not need to be monitored by someone who could answer for it. Him. Yes, he was your husband. It was up to him to be there for her. You should know that. I should have been more present. I should have paid more attention to each sign ...  
And as if the punishment of living without her was not enough, it was up to him the final sentence: the order to turn off the devices that kept her breathing.  
At the same time that he lacked the strength to formulate the answer to the doctor, he felt that he owed Jane this. If you failed with everything else, you should put an end to your suffering now.  
Happened again. The beautiful girl with green eyes, brave and determined, put in his care and he failed. Take it over, Weller! Receive your punishment as you deserve!  
“Mr. Weller, are you okay?” The doctor's voice called him back from his thoughts.  
After a long sigh, he was able to speak:  
“Yes and no.”  
“May I continue or do you need some time?”  
“Please say everything you have to say ...” he said feeling destroyed.  
“As I was saying, we generally recommend turning off the devices. But there is something else to consider. Her blood tests were altered and we discovered a pregnancy still in its early stages, no more than three or four weeks according to ultrasound and betaHCG.  
Kurt wished himself death. Besides giving the sentence to Jane would also have the life of their son?  
\- There are reports of similar cases in which it was possible to keep the mother's body functioning long enough until the baby had a chance to survive outside the womb. But there are many factors to consider. The pregnancies were more advanced, not every case was successful, none of the women had suffered poisoning by ZIP. The fetal embryology team believes there is a chance that the fetus has not been contaminated. But it is an assumption because there are no pre-existing cases that serve as a benchmark. Anyway, it is up to you to decide what we will do from now on. I will leave you alone for a few minutes. But if your decision is in favor of maintaining it so we can try to carry the pregnancy forward, we need to know soon. There are procedures that we need to carry out as soon as possible.”  
The doctor went out the door leaving Kurt still shocked by the news. He propped his elbows on his knees and dropped his head in his hands. Even the tears left him.  
If there was someone who could share that decision with him ...  
Avery! It was her mother there.  
No! Jane would never agree to put any weight on that decision on the girl. She herself would decide without sharing with anyone.  
And what would Jane do? Jane ... oh, Jane never stopped, never gave up ...  
The decision was made. And again it was Jane changing her whole life. Even without knowing if he would have the strength to endure the journey ahead, he would have to face it. It would give Jane a chance to bring their son into the world.  
******************************  
Friends embraced him, making themselves available for whatever was necessary. Everyone was exhausted, desperate for some peace and quiet after so many months of struggle. So desperate that they prepared themselves for the worst, to say goodbye to Jane that same day and, from there, finally resume their lives.  
But it is clear that the tattooed woman refused to return to that suitcase, now transformed into a morgue bag. It forced them to pursue a new insane routine with an unpredictable outcome.  
And it was impossible to deny that to Jane, even if the hope of success was practically nonexistent. Everyone felt guilty.  
******************************  
Avery listened to Kurt's report on the phone in complete silence. She was finishing his second year in neuroscience and was perfectly capable of understanding the meaning of everything his stepfather told, perhaps even more than himself.  
Then came the pregnancy bomb. Of course, Jane was pregnant. She always managed to make things much more complicated even in the worst situations.  
“You agreed to try to carry on the pregnancy, didn't you?” She said quickly when Kurt fell silent on the other end of the line. The strength of the sentence showed how much she looked like her mother.  
“Yes. That was my decision.”  
“Great. It is the decision she would expected. But you know that the chances are slim.”  
“I know, Avery. I know. - and heard the girl snorting on the other end of the line.”  
“She did it again. It is taking the decision to turn off the devices off our shoulders.”  
“Yeah, I thought about that too ...”  
And Avery hung up without saying goodbye. Kurt understood. He knew she was in tears now.  
The routine of entering the ICU was lacerating. With the emotional in tatters and the tension outlining each of the muscles of his body, putting on the right clothes and washing his hands following the recommendations seemed much more difficult than avoiding a shower of shots and shooting down five enemies on the field.  
When he approached Jane's bed, the number of devices connected to her made her stomach churn. At first, he only observed every detail of that new reality that would accompany him in the coming months: the numbers on the monitors, the sound of the constant beep, the drip controlled by the infusion pumps, the expansion and retraction of the respirator.  
Only when his eyes landed on her did something inside him change. Jane looked so fragile and tiny in that bed. So pale and inert. But she was serene, determined to fill Kurt's heart with a hope he already considered lost.  
Even with only a shred of life, Jane was still able to bring it out of the sea of darkness where she used to dive in search of shelter.  
Kurt leaned over and brushed his lips against the soft skin of her forehead. He was unable to smell that smell that she normally emanated, one of the sweetest scents he had ever known. Everything around him smelled of asepsis. But the texture of her skin was the same.  
He sat down and ran his fingers over the skin of her bare arm, letting the lines of the tattoos stick to his memory more than ever. He reached for his wife's hand and intertwined his fingers with hers:  
“Hello, Janie ... Here we are prepared for another mission, our last mission, honey. I won't talk about how I'm feeling for you know, you always know. Just as you know that I will be here, by your side, for as long as necessary. Everyone says that our chances are slim ... If it doesn't work, Sweet heart, fine. But I don't think they know you like me. There is a thread of hope inside me that insists on believing that everything will be all right ... - and dried up the tears that escaped without his authorization. - The baby and I are so lucky to have you, Janie.”  
***********************  
Kurt was away for two weeks. Then he started providing consulting services to the FBI. This job brought in some income and maintained health insurance that ensured that Jane remained at the NYO Hospital. In addition, the partial schedule allowed him to make daily morning and evening visits.  
He would sit there and talk to her and the baby, as if everything was fine and they were at home.  
Tasha was now the new Assistant Director of SIOC. Rich shared Afreen's work in the technology lab. Patterson was dedicated to an NGO that taught programming to teenagers at risk while their game apps were a success. She continued in New York to assist both SIOC and Tasha when the baby was born.  
A week after Kurt returned to work, Allie came to visit him with Bethany. Having her daughter there, hugging her and being able to dive into her childhood universe was so refreshing for him. It also fueled their hopes. Soon there would be two children there on the floor of his office. He was determined to be strong and face it all for Jane. But that weekend was a balm that made him consider, for the first time, having a sincere conversation with Allie just before the two left:  
“Thank you so much for bringing Bethany. I needed that.”  
“ know, that's why we came. She needs you, too.”  
“It really did me a lot of good, Allie. And it makes me think that being with her more often may be all I need right now.”  
“I agree with you. Allow yourself that, Kurt. Nobody is made of iron. Our daughter is an incredible child and you have been apart for too long.”  
"You know I never charged for Bethany. I know I was not there as much as I should have been. But if there is any chance of bringing it closer ... The newspapers often speak of the sheer number of pensions in NYC's US Marshall, perhaps ...”  
"Kurt ..." she interrupted and stopped to breathe for the right words. “Bethany has a life in Colorado: school, friends, ballet, just like me too. Breaking through all this to bring her back to NYC is complicated. Also, you may need Colorado in the future.”  
He lowered his head, trying to camouflage his emotions.  
“We really had plans for that, Allie. I swear. But now it can take a long time for this to happen.”  
“Or not. At best, in eight to ten months you could be moving. It could be worse next week. You know that the chances of the baby surviving are small. So I can't involve Bethany in this, Kurt. But please you know that we will always be there for you. If all goes well, we will be there to welcome you and help you with the baby. If everything goes wrong, remember that you already have a beautiful and healthy daughter, capable of understanding everything and suffering. Jane is no longer suffering. She cannot see or hear you, nor does she miss you as her daughter. So, go to Colorado even while all this is not resolved. For you and Bethany. I know it must hurt to hear that. I really didn't want to be the person to tell you these things. But someone needs to help you see beyond the love you feel for Jane.”  
He shook his head in agreement with her, even though his heart disagreed. I needed to face reality no matter how much I kept a flame of hope alive.  
Ten weeks later ....  
“Look, I just can't, you know? I even wanted to, but I can't.”  
“All right, Avery. I'm sure she understands.”  
“But I wanted you to put an audio of mine for her to hear. Okay, I know it's useless. She doesn't hear anymore ...”  
“I think if she could hear it, it would make her very happy.”  
“I'll think about what to say and send you later. I know it's still early, but I'm starting to think she'll make it, you know? I didn't think she would make it this far ...”  
“She's doing great. She is pampered by everyone in the ICU. They call her Snow White ... “- and cleared his throat trying to undo the choking knot.  
“It´s too bad in real life it is not possible to bring someone back with a kiss. If such a magical kiss of love existed, I am sure that what you feel for her would do that.” - and paused she briefly to control the voice that already betrayed her, carried by the feelings that rose quickly – “Thanks for taking care of Jane for me, Kurt. - and rushed out again.”  
Later that day ....  
Kurt was already more used to the routine of entering the ICU now. Still, the steps between the preparation room and Jane's bed were still passed by feeling the blood pulse in her veins. Only after checking her serenity and constancy in the devices did he calm down.  
He took the chair and linked his fingers with hers. He sighed, swallowing that sensation that grew stronger with each. That idea that it could be forever, that they would only have a few more months to go.  
“Good night, Janie. I talked to the doctors now. Everyone is optimistic. You have been surprising everyone by staying stable without complications. That's really good. This afternoon's ultrasound showed that the baby is doing very well too. She moves a lot, somersaults. This is a great sign that she is doing well. Maybe I should start thinking about a name for her ... Ah, Avery was very happy to know that she will have a sister. Bethany too. And I brought a surprise. Your daughter have been missing you and decided to record it for you ...” - and turned on his cell phone to let her stepdaughter's audio play.  
“Hi, Jane. I have heard you're doing well. And that we will have one more little girl in the family. I was very happy with that. Look, I know it took me a while to do that. I was pretty busy with college ... I don't know what to say ... Damn, I actually want to ask you to stay. But it is not fair because what you have achieved so far is already amazing. So, stay strong. And know that this time, you are not alone. I love you mom. We are so lucky to have you.”  
Two days later, at Kurt's apartment  
Friends showed up with a pizza. A lame excuse to be together and keep Weller company at night. They tried to leave the mood pleasant, like optimism prevailing over the void they felt for Jane's absence. It was when his cell phone notified new messages that made him take the air demonstrating that a conflict had been installed inside him.  
-“What happened?”- Patterson was the first to ask.  
“Nothing. Is nothing.” He said, turning off the device.  
“Is it from the hospital? Something about Jane?” Tasha insisted feeling that there was no truth in his account.  
“No. It was Allie. Bethany will have a ballet performance next weekend and she is insisting that I go.”  
“Ah, how beautiful, Kurt! You can't miss this.” Patterson insisted.  
“Yes, she will be so happy to have her father there.” Tasha continued.  
“Maybe I'll go. I’ll take a flight on Saturday morning and I will return on Sunday.” He spoke without looking at his friends.  
Everyone exchanged discreet looks in a silent agreement to offer support. Rich came over and put his hand on his friend's back.  
“I can make visiting hours at your place while you're in Colorado. Jane must be missing me. I don't want to brag, but I'm more fun than you are.”  
“Ah, Rich, try to be less selfish. I miss Jane too. Of course, I would never take a single minute away from Kurt's visits, but if he isn't, I will definitely make you share the visits with me!”  
“And I?” Boston joined the conversation. "Do you think that just because I was never an FBI, I don't miss her? So you better remember that we both have a story together that neither of you participated in. I'm sure she is eager to know how my career and narwhal stage are going.”  
“Are you excluding me just because I'm pregnant?” Tasha pointed out. “You are crazy if you think I will give up being with her. Two pregnant women have a lot to talk about. So, Weller, better plan this trip for more days.”  
Kurt smiled with emotion, but he was still sad.  
“I have no words to thank you for all the support all you are giving me. Allie is insisting that I go on Tuesday. But it really is difficult ... all I can do now is be there on those visits. I have to be there.”  
The friends exchanged looks full of understanding again. Tasha felt that it was up to her to open the difficult part of the conversation:  
“The feeling of guilt is not just yours. I've asked myself a thousand times why I didn't pay any more attention to her.”  
"She said she was fine after being shot when Ivy caught you. I saw how pale I was, but I followed. I should have learned my lesson and distrusted her reactions in the lab.” Rich confessed.  
“I hated myself for not being at SIOC with you.” Boston continued. “I wouldn't be so involved in the search for Ivy and would stay with her at the hospital until the antidote ended. Ready!”  
“Okay, okay, okay. Do you want to talk about guilt? How about we consider the error in the dose of the antidote? But none of that changes where we are now. Jane just thought of us. It's time for us to do the same for her. I think you know what her choice would be, Kurt.”  
Kurt pursed his lips and smiled sadly. I was quite sure what Jane would advise in that situation: "Go stay with Bethany and let me say goodbye to each of them." Her voice with her unique smile was so alive in her mind.  
“I'm going to Colorado on Tuesday, then.”

Those were such nice days. Bethany had a gift for abstracting all anxiety and fear from him. Those moments with her daughter were even too tempting. The desire to see a brief outcome for everything that lived in NYC almost sprang up inside him. But at the end of the day, when he put his head on the pillow, his conscience was heavy. Jane was still fighting. It wasn't fair to give up while she resisted.  
The ballet performance was delightful. Bethany was the most beautiful girl in the class, despite having to admit that she was not the most skilled in dance moves. But it didn't matter. It was perfect.  
While celebrating at McDonald’s for the little ballerina to get enough of all the fries she was entitled to and still bring a try to home, Allie suggested that he not return on Sunday and take the opportunity to have a family barbecue. Kurt agreed. It would be just a few more hours in Colorado and it would make all the difference for Bethany since he didn't even remember the last time they had a Sunday afternoon together. He called the travel agency and rescheduled the flight.  
On Sunday morning, he called Tasha to inform him of the change in plans. Perhaps none of the friends were prepared to visit Jane that night, but he was at peace with it. Even though everyone said it wouldn't make a difference to him, he insisted otherwise, but he knew she understood.  
“So, how is the life of the father of the dancer?” - the latina answered cheerfully with an unusual excitement.  
“She was just perfect, Tasha. I made several videos. It was unforgettable.”  
“I'm sure yes.”  
“So Allie wants us to have a barbecue this afternoon, so I won't be back until tomorrow.”  
“Only tomorrow?” the friend seemed apprehensive at the news.  
“But don't worry. I know you weren't planning on visiting Jane tonight. It's okay for anyone to go.”  
“And what time do you arrive on Monday?” Tasha asked in distress.  
“Late afternoon.”  
The latina cleared her throat and drew in air. It was too long to keep him uninformed. She know that she needed to tell the truth now.  
“Well, Kurt. There were some changes with Jane. We talked and thought it best to wait for Bethany's performance to pass and you return to tell you.”  
It hit him while the floor beneath his own seemed to open up. Afflicted questioned:  
“God, Tasha, say it soon. How is she?”  
“She's fine now, Kurt. It started over the week. Jane seemed to be experiencing more frequent and intense spasms. Light movements of the fingers. Small things, but doctors thought it best to do an electroencephalogram. The exam showed nothing significant. And everything was stable. So they just watched. Yesterday morning she had significant respiratory distress. The doctors found that the tube was out of place.  
While listening to Tasha, Kurt paced. Hell, he has been these for days, why did he change the damn ticket?  
“Out of place? Did they change the tube? How can this get out of place?”  
“When the doctors called to inform that they would need to re-intubate her, we all went to the hospital. We also find it strange. We suspect some mistake by the nursing team. We were there, in the waiting room, when they tried to perform the procedure.”  
“What means they tried?”  
“In fact, they did the full procedure. Then the doctor came out to talk to us. He was telling us that her breathing was back to normal when the nurse came to call him because the discomfort started again. - and the latina laughed in a strange way.”  
“Tasha, please, I don't see the fun in that. How is she?”  
“I said. She is fine. It was the tube out of place again, Kurt. Someone was trying to force it out of her.”  
“My God, who did this? How can you let that happen? I thought she was safe there.”  
“Kurt ...” Tasha interrupted already showing the tears. “It was Jane. She was pulling on the tube. She's here. Jane woke up.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
